It Happens

A glimpse at the mindset of the deities who watch over Avlis.

Please note: This is a collection of OOC (out of character) jokes.

Dagath (Life): Shit happens.

Dagath (Death): You're done with shit happening. Hurrah!

Dagath (Rebirth): Just kidding. Instead, you get entirely new shit!

Aarilax: If shit happens, find the guy who caused it and kill him.

Alifanitax: Should have seen this shit coming.

Andrinor: If it looks like shit might happen, counterspell it.

Angadar: I have studied shit happening for centuries, and it'll never happen to you. No, really! Honest!

Aryeh Gidol: What kind of shit did my son get into this time?

Balgar: "If it is not wemic shit why would I care?"

Berryn: This shit happens every single morning!

Bobil: I don't have time for this shit, I'm too busy with Angadar's shit!

Cha'reth: Drink this potion, get plenty of bed rest, and call me if the shit happens again.

Clangeddin Silverbeard: If ye put dat shite on me anvil, Oi'll crump yer arse frae here ter next Tuesday!

Corellon Larethian: Elf Shit is the most graceful of all the shit there is. Just try not to step in Orc shit.

Dead Dreamer: How much shit did I miss?

Dra'Nar: If I'd known my parents, none of this shit would have happened.

Dre'Ana: Men just aren't equipped to deal with this shit happening. It's up to us, ladies!

Dru'El: What does your heart tell you about shit happening?

Evrak: I love it when shit happens.

Fegall: Whenever shit happens, the device will begin to whir. Avoid the acid scythes, and press the red button fourteen times, followed by the green three times, then the red again. Shout “OH SHIT!” into this funnel, then close your eyes. After several seconds, the device will begin spewing flowers!

Forian: I didn't expect shit like this to happen!

Gorethar: Shit is evil. Stop it from happening!

Hurine: Shit happened, but I sold everything short so I'm cool.

Ingoren: Shit might float... but you do not.

Kelvos: This shit is pretty bad now, but the make-up sex will be great.

Kimonictinus: When shit happens, it is because I allow it to.

Kuthos: What is this shit? I hate this shit. Kill it all.

Maleki: I made that shit happen.

Mikon: Shit happens to everybody eventually.

Mishlekh: A couple more drinks and you'll forget allllll about that shit.

O'Ma: In the end, shit happening is for the best.

Paragus: If you come in here, shit will happen all over your boots...

Pelar (old): I'm on the trail of somebody else's shit happening...

Pelar (new): If you're too wasteful, no shit will ever happen again.

Ptah: When shit happens, it's best to just leave town.

Qinoxitl: ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚͡ ͡҉PRəPA҉̵̡̢̛̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇̊̋̌̍̎̏̿̿̿̔̚̕̚̕̚҉Rə FoR THə҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚͡AWAKeN|NG ͡҉THAT DEVoURS YOUR MIN̵̡̢̛̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇̊̋̌̍̎̏̿̿̿̔̚̕̚̕̚҉D AND SoUL... ҉SH҉IT COMəS̵̡̢̛̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇̊̋̌̍̎̏̿̿̿̚ ҉!!

Ra-Ghul: THIS SHIT IS REALLY STARTING TO PISS ME OFF!!!

Senath: I have a cunning plan to avoid shit happening to me, whilst luring you into the shit instead.

Sharistracterus: Shit's never gonna happen. HA! I lied, shit totally just happened, sucker.

Skern: We can deal with all this shit together!

Stephanus: I'm an expert at this shit.

The Harpinger: If the shit gets bad enough, I might drop by...

The'ton: Are you sure shit isn't happening to your children right this very second? Well are you?!

Tobin Dracon will scare you shitless!!

Toran: Shit happens exactly when it's supposed to.

Valok: This shit was somebody else's fault, but I fixed it...

Verossa: When shit happens in the woods, burn it.

Vorin: According to the Pocket Guide to Excrement, Volume VII, examination of this shit can tell us much about what might be happening...

Wilsash: This shit is your worst nightmare.

Xenon: Shit always sticks to your fur!