Hey fiddle-faddle, an elf and a paddle,
Once met with a dryad sublime.
The dryad in question looked great in a saddle;
They had quite a smacking good time.
Chorus: Nonsense! Nonsense! Sir, don't you have any conscience?
Hey toodle-doodle, a dwarf and a poodle,
Once met in a Romini bath.
The dog was quite pleased with the dwarf's mighty noodle,
But tooth marks stirred up the dwarf's wrath.
Hey piddle-diddle, a nymph and a fiddle,
Once met two young maids most risque.
The nymph used his fiddle to get in the middle;
He dawdled then went on his way.
(softly) Ask me no question, I'll tell you no lie --
A conscience IS nonsense, and that's my reply!