The ABC's of Love

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ABC's of Love by Nawen Amakiir

  • Instrument: 24 String Lute
  • Costume: Pinks and Whites
  • First Performed: Short Stuff, an Evening with Brant Risko


So many ways, so many styles, but always one meaning
Fun is learning them all and you can trust me
I am the Sage of the Unspeakable, Poet of Lust, and Singer of Sin
Let's start at the top!

Aarilaxians murder you down there in the act... So messy!
Alifanitaxist knows more about hedonism and debauchery than the fey... well did. Then I came along!
Andrinorians make it magical!... So many sparkles! Watch out for the surges!
Angadarians trick you into revealing your ways... Cause they don't have any of their own!
Aryeh Gidolist are kitty..... Oh right, no more, me bad!

Balgarelt are... Fenfen refer the last line of the second verse
Berrynist leaves you as fresh as spring, use your imagination... fenfen height joke!
Blibdoolpoolpians who gives a fuck, probably lays eggs of something... Like you never wonder where Glosht comes from?
Bobilist to it so strong so you don't notice what they lack... fenfen work that other muscule!

Cha'rethist heal your soul and body as you do them... Sexual healing is a divine rite!
Clangeddinians get confused if you don't have hairy ankles but the pounding great... And my still aren't, stop asking!
Corellon Larethianist turn into a battle cause love is a fight of passions... I surrender..sureender...ummm surrender!

Dagathites will give you a thousand tiny deaths then you feel reborn... and need a sandwich!
Dead Dreamerings shreds your morality like its paper... Shred me again and again!
Dra'Narites are a hero in your bed and know how to change a diaper!... Might be handy!
Dre'Anaist sticks to their own kind and I am not saying what happens in the baths!... Ask me later?
Dru'Elite do it in the bushes or is it with the bushes, some of them love trees that might be dryads... Let's hope they are or did we just learn how Dryads are made?

Evrakist make you suffer through awful foreplay... So not worth it!
Fegallites like to craft a bed then take you in it... Should see mine, so lovely!
Forianites prefer genderbending and roleplaying... I was once a three-legged credenza and she was the archduke of Julaspium
Goretharties launch a holy inquisition to see if you are worthy.. Give you a hint. No one is! Still looking for where new ones come from
Gruumshist... Gruumshist... who wants to know how Ocs do it!... So smelly!

Harpingerians will hit all your notes but will you survive the journey there?... wonder how I can reach those notes?
Hurineites will leave you a few coins and more if you were good... How did you think I got so rich? Crafting? Please, to lazy!
Ingorenians leave you salty... fenfen that was to easy, low hanging...fruit!
Kelvites will give you your deepest desires but watch the thorns... So erotic! Leave some gem or wine or else!
Keringtons want to test you to see if you can jerk meats... Try a mouthful!
Kimonictinusist doesn't know what to do on the top, they like to be under... He a bottom!
Kuthosians will blindly do the act till they can do it no more... No wonder they're so many half-fey demons!

Malekiites are giant... See a healer afterward, they got a cream for it.
Mikonist will give you an equal amount of foreplay and loving as they watch the sands fall in the glass... Balanced but planned!
Mishlekhingtons love making wine in bed or anyway if you're willing... and you wonder where Fey Wine comes...from!
Narenist might be faking it but you better not, they will know... Rehearse your lines and bow after the climax but they are getting the roses.
O'Maist love to talk about the greater good but in the act, they are the greater good that needs attention?... So worth it!

Paragians.... do you like steak for dinner?... They don't even have to take you out for one!
Pelarites will stalk and hunt you down, trust me on this, you will never be the same... This is known!
Ptahings like to take you here and there but never long enough to enjoy it... Always moving along
Qinoxitlist will whisper the dark truth to you while driving you mad with desire for more ... And you wonder why I can say I am the sage of the Unspeakable

Ra-Ghulins wreck the bed, tear up the rug, destroy your room, and pee in the corner!... Still can't find my cat after that.
Senathites plan out every move as they conquer you... but they overplay and leave you halfway there
Sharistracterusites scheme to do it darkly with a cunning tongue... Almost as good as Dre'Anites at that!... Almost!
Skernist want to share you with the community and that's fenfen... Meet you at Zim's party for demonstrations!
Stephanusite are to busy looking in the mirror at their own body to see you... Took care of it myself

The'tonics will make you fear the ravishing... So worth it if you are brave enough to try.
Ti'si'faanist do it out in the sunlight... How do you think my skin got sunkissed?
Titania will love you if your pure and kill you when you finish... Stay away from them!
Tobinist does it dragonstyle!... Don't worry some of them can look like people!
Toranites make you fill out paperwork in triplicate and get it signed by the adjunct... Then your not in the mood

Valokians make it sound intriguing but afterward, they are polling the neighbors about how they performed... while you finish the job!
Verossaians will shock your straight hair into curls and curly ones straight!... No wonder Elves and Fey don't have that problem
Vorinites follow the book they read on the act... Flip my pages like a smutty novel you hide under your bed cause you're a naughty student!
Wilsashist will worship your moon and take you the stars!... But the dreams about it suck!
Xenonites always come out when the moon is out and looking to bury a bone!... Hopefully not while his buddy Wilsash is playing with yours!

Yeraiahites loves to be in charge and on top. Are you with a child yet? Here a pamphlet on ten successful positions to try!... Trust me they left several at the keep
Zhitaril does it spooky with vampires and your mummy!... Not something you want to walk in on!

That's the ABC's of love and don't make me repeat it
Cause I'll be smitten by half a dozen of the faiths for revealing this
So you should have listened