The True Story of Moo

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The True Story of Moo
Written by Nawen Amakiir Ael'nyon & Aria Ashby

This a tale of most just payback but done with a style all its own and born of minds most fancy to such desires. The events written about are true and the names are real. Let our story begin!


Back when I was young and the world held itself open. I meet Aria and we became fast friends that day. Shortly later due to events on Yasgard her boyfriend Ed ask me to become Aria'a bodyguard; a duty that I hold with honor till I pass. Well, it wasn't long after day that the story of Moo came to be.


One morning there I was looking about the Elf Gate and Ed spotted me and came up to me. We talked for a few moments about this and that. Then he offered me a new creation of this; that he said had pants that suited my true nature. I thought there was a top, I could have sworn there was a top. However, before I knew it I was topless at the Elf Gate and Ed was laughing and pointing. On a personal note, I am as shapely as a male when it comes to my bust but I was still topless and Ed was laughing. So, I was mad and yelled at him but it didn't make a dent in that fat orc's head.


When I finally came back out to the Elf Gate after showing off my chest for all to see. I ran into Aria who was in about the same mood as me. Pissy and Bitchy for those keeping score. It seems Ed and her were in Mithro Rest doing some crab hunting with some friends. When Ed got off on one of his hobbies. That hobby is chasing tails and this lady had a good one for pulling and tugging; that doesn't mean what you think he loves to pull and tug on tails. Which means he wasn't paying attention to Aria and Aria being Aria got lost. Now those that don't know about the crabs that live in Yasgard; they are about the size of a house and their shells so thick that magic doesn't even dent them. Putting Aria at a serious disadvantage and really in a perilous place. Lucky for Aria that a good friend name Ling had noticed they were one short and backtracked looking for the misguided Aria and found her. He leads her back to the others and she tore into Ed; who hadn't even noticed Aria had gone missing from the group due to playing and tugging at another woman's tail. Aria said her peace and departed through the magical portals back home to Elysia. Which is where I meet her and learned of her troubles. I then told her about mine and the plotting started.


Through the day, Aria kept commenting on feeling like crap and wanting to get even. One doesn't have to say that twice around me without my mind figuring something out. Which it did; turn Ed's place into a zoo or a barn. The real question was how and that was Aria's area of knowledge. Before I knew it she was reading her jeweled covered tome and moments later a cow was following us around. However, just so we didn't get caught or spotted she hasted both us and the cow. I think we almost died to see a fat and lazy cow move that fast. We did this twice then set about bringing them all the grains and hay they could eat and enough water to keep them happy. With all the hay, grains, and water they could want they were bound to make a huge stinky mess in Ed's place.


The next day we saw Ed and when we asked how his place as he was none too happy. To which Aria said he shouldn't have made us feel like crap but since he had we made sure he lived in crap. Least for a day to teach him a lesson about making us mad.


To this day this story cannot be told be either of us without busting into giggling fits and screaming Mooo!!! or Farmer Ed!!! and if Ed is about he gets none too happy when we call him Farmer Ed.


For those that love animals more than others. The cows were not harmed in this story. Ed got the farmer to come and fetch his cattle from his house.