The Birth of Grease Wrestling
The Birth of Grease Wrestling
Grease wrestling appears to be a widely popular sport in some circles, but few know of the actual origins of the sport. So here I give a little history about how the sport came to be and some high profile matches that may have led to its popularity.
One cool evening east of the Fairy Gardens three figures are walking down the road. One is a ginger haired older elf, wearing a set of horns; next to him stands a curious looking woman, with horns and a tail; the third member is a wretched looking redheaded elven crack head of Dru'El wearing high heeled women's boots. Yes, these three unlikely individuals developed this wonderful past time enjoyed by many across T'Nanshi and beyond. These three individuals felt the need to develop an easily enjoyable passtime for the Nation of T'Nanshi, and perhaps all of Avlis. They studiously weighed and balanced many ideas. They slaved away day and night before arriving at Grease Wrestling in its form today.
Well, actually, it was nothing like that.
Fydonya Ivythorn, the fiery young woman with the horns and tail, had just been elevated to an Avenger of Dru'El and we were looking to celebrate. Ivy and myself, the older elf wearing the set of horns, known to some as Aramil "Bubba" Hanlen, always did enjoy a good wrestling match. Sometimes we'd include Celedor, the wretched looking red headed elven crack head of Dru'El wearing high heeled women's boots, but this day we weren't quite sure if he was really there, as he was partaking in his usual ritual of sucking his Goat. To the amazement, and perhaps ridicule, of onlooking Avengers, Ivy and I began our wrestling routine. After several rounds, we decided to try something different and spice up our match. Both of us, having been gifted with spells from Dru'El and possessing several Rods of Grease, spontaneously noticed that this one spell was notoriously underused, and could potentially add a particular amount of fun and silliness to our usual matches. Yes, we might have been a bit high when coming to this conclusion, but that is beside the point. Celedor, in his stupor, of course egged us on and encouraged our experimentation. Actually, I think he was egging Ivy on to kick my ass, but anyways it was on that day when Grease Wrestling was born. The world is perhaps lucky that His Wretchedness, the High Priest of Blandenberg was Goat-faced, otherwise it is likely that Grease Wrestling would not exist in its form today, likely to have been replaced with Greasy Mr. Death Fishy Death matches.
Some high profile exposures of the sport include Ivy and Celedor's Wedding. Said match involved many notable wrestlers including Elrendar, currently Archmage of the Green Order, every speaker of the Hands of Dru'El since Cha'reth (though I'm sure Cha'reth would have loved to join in), of course myself, Ivy and Celedor, and believe it or not, Arch-Paladin Thror took part in the festivities (though perhaps not by choice). This Wonderful match began when an "unnamed" elf fired a Rod of Grease into Thror's Beard after the ceremony. At some point skunks became involved, but that is another story.
There was also the fierce battle of the Visimontium Hot springs, which occured during the opening of the Temple of Dru'El in Visimontium. Representing the T'Nanshi men were myself and Talin Na'Eldamar. Representing the Visimontium women's team were Rika Vandor, Miette Hartley and one other individual, but I can't remember who. It was an epic battle in the grease and hot springs of Visimontium even with the treacherous defection of Talin to the women's team as their manager, the match was brought to a standstill. Sadly once the Ice storms came out, T'Nanshi was forced to concede defeat, because Miette's Ice storms were bigger than mine. Unfortunately that attempt to set up a Grease Wrestling league was not all that successful, and no further match ups occured. (Events of this match may have been glorified by the consumption of mellowsmoke).
There you have it, a brief account of the early history of Grease Wrestling. Also apparently along the way we were involved in the founding of the T'Nanshi Grease Wrestling Federation.
Of course don't forget about the Excellent Grease Wrestling pit in the Moon Tree Distillery.
Written by Aramil "Bubba" Hanlen